Girls' Night Out

So the girls went out in Red Bank on Saturday: Me, Melissa, Susan, and Gabrielle plus a male guest, John. Upon learning that Gabrielle was bringing her new love interest, PostBoy suggested that I should behave as if John weren't there, feeling free to ask questions such as "So, Gabrielle, how does John stack up in bed compared with Carlos?"

We took polaroids that I probably will not post. Everyone at the table agreed that the left (Banana Boat) side of my face looks better than the right (Olay Regenerist) side. Note to hedge funds: Sell P&G short. Susan, does this now qualify as financial writing worthy of a link from your hypothetical blog?

Susan craves young boys to pleasure her...as a result of too much reading of the NYPost this weekend, I suggested that she take up teaching high school or, to keep her out of jail, perhaps a freshman college course like "Introduction to Communications."

Gabrielle did indeed bring her new/old love, John, which distanced her from us a bit. I guess she ran into him at her 20th high school reunion last year and they sort of picked up where they left off. And when I asked the key question, she said he had wildly improved in the bedroom since the old days. Poor Gabrielle is still living with Carlos, sleeping in her son's top bunk bed, and trying to figure out her life until and after a divorce. It is hard to imagine the life she lives with Carlos just to keep her family together...cooking for him, keeping up the house, lying to her children about "business trips" and Carlos' snoring as the excuse for not sleeping in the same room with him, and putting up with Carlos' insulting treatment. So it is no wonder she's been looking elsewhere for love, and I guess I'm glad for her that she can find refuge with John.

I talked less than I would have liked with Melissa, who was across the table from me at dinner. She has learned that she is having a boy, which leaves me with a closet full of pink baby clothes.