The Somerset County 4-H Fair is Coming! August 13, 14, and 15, 2008

August 13-14-15, 2008
North Branch Park, Milltown Road, Bridgewater, N.J.

What began as a dairy show in a farm field has become one of the marquee events on the Somerset County cultural calendar and the premier free fair in New Jersey...

I have been going to the Somerset County 4-H Fair for over 35 years, since before I was even old enough to be a 4-H Prep Club member. Despite the fact that we live in Morris County, as soon as London was old enough to join last September, I started taking her over to the Prep Club meetings at the Ted Blum 4-H Center in Bridgewater, NJ (Somerset County, about five minutes from the house I grew up in). After London's first year in the Crazy Clovers Prep Club, with Maddie participating as a "tag-along" and planning to join the club in September, our family continues to believe that Somerset County 4-H is the best 4-H experience in the surrounding area.

The Somerset County 4-H Fair, rather than going commercial with rides and games, focuses on the kids and their achievements. Our whole family loves to see the dogs, cows, sheep, rabbits, goats, horses and alpaca. In the chicken tent, there's always an incubator full of eggs with chicks being hatched before your eyes. This year, I'll commit to bringing my new Canon EOS Rebel XSi and sharing lots of animal photos here.

This year's Somerset County 4-H Fair promises to be bigger and better than ever, attracting tens of thousands of visitors with its wholesome mix of arts, entertainment, agriculture, animals, science, food, fellowship and just plain fun.

The 2008 Somerset County, NJ 4-H Fair runs Wednesday, August 13th through Friday, August 15th. 10am-10pm all days. Don't worry, we'll be reminding you here at Roxiticus Desperate Housewives a few more times over the next four weeks. And late in the afternoon of Wednesday, August 13th, you can look for London, Maddie and me in the 4-H Prep Club Cotton Candy Tent!

Roxiticus Desperate Housewives Super-Celebration: 25,000th Visitor, 475th Post, Plus a Truckload of Awards

Whew...Visitor #25,000 snuck right past me this afternoon! He or she came in via BlogExplosion to vote on my current Battle of the Blogs against Casual Slack (quality nonsense, served up fresh -- daily). Visitor #25,000 came from Paris, Ile-de-France and only stayed long enough to vote. Come back and comment, Visitor #25,000! Let us know whether you voted for Roxiticus Desperate Housewives! Since I lost that battle (9-6), I'm going to guess "NO."

Underworld Spy Roxy's Suspicion: My powers of deduction are telling me that the 25,000th visitor to Roxiticus Desperate Housewives was my current Battle of the Blogs competitor, Kittie of What's New Pussycat.

I'd like to take this opportunity to celebrate a couple of Roxiticus Desperate Milestones and to accept a truckload of awards!

First, a very special award from my good blogosphere buddy, Cindi, who has presented Roxiticus Desperate Housewives with Moomette's Best WAHM Site, an award for Super WAHM-owned websites. While Rex and I own a small investment bank with an office in New York City, we frequently work from home, and I almost always blog from home, so I'm happy to qualify and honored to accept this tremendous award. Thanks, Cindi! One of Cindi's blogs, Moomettesgram's Musings, is going to be watching over Roxiticus Desperate Housewives from my EntreCard widget on Saturday, July 19th, so be sure to drop it like its hot and click through to Moomette!

Next, I have borrowed LadyJava's awards lorry to transport all of the awards that LJ and Mariuca shared with me all the way from Malaysia to the Roxiticus Valley! On the truck, you'll see:

• The Arte y Pico Award;
• The Share the Love Award;
• The You Cheer Me Up Award for bloggers who cheer their readers up by making them laugh or feel good in their own special way;
• The Perfect Blend of Friendship Award; and
• The Cool Cat (aaaahchooo!) Award, among others.

Last, but not least, I'd like to thank all of you for visiting and reading, and to let you know that this is Post #475 on Roxiticus Desperate Housewives, and we're showing no signs of stopping. For the next three weeks, we're leading up to our Third Blogiversary Celebration on Tuesday, August 5, 2008, possibly to be combined with Post #500 and the grand unveiling of a brand new WordPress MU Community by Roxy...

Raise a glass!

War Games Celebrates 25th Anniversary....Could Roxy Really Be That Old?

Do you remember young Matthew Broderick and Ally Sheedy in WarGames? Well, if you do, I guess you're as old as Roxy here, as War Games is celebrating its 25th anniversary with an event playing in select theaters nationwide for one night only on Thursday, July 24th.

I was more of a Rob Lowe/Demi Moore "About Last Night" or "St. Elmo's Fire" fan -- the darker side of the Brat Pack -- but my high school years made the 1980s my prime movie-watching period. Sure, I cried with Molly Ringwald in "Sixteen Candles" and laughed about Michael J. Fox's Calvin Klein underwear in "Back To The Future." And we all wished we had the cool, laid back style of Ferris Bueller on his Day Off. While movies from the 80s are a thing of the past, they will forever be remembered and re-watched on DVD...."see how funny people looked and dressed when mommy was your age?"

In the triumphant 25th anniversary return of WarGames, a young Matthew Broderick stars in an 80s sci-fi thriller about a computer hacker who unwittingly gets the chance to play a game with the US Military's war computer. This movie came out before Al Gore invented the Internet, around the time when Tipper Gore was censoring music instead.

The 25th anniversary showing is one night only on Thursday night, July 24th, 2008, and will include never-before-seen interviews with film’s creators and the cast (including Broderick and Ally Sheedy) and crew on how the movie was ahead of its time and its relevance today. Additionally, only at this one night event, viewers will get a sneak peek at the making of the sequel – WarGames: The Dead Code.

Roxy's New Best Friends: Mario and Michael at M&M Perrotti's Butcher Shop and Prepared Foods in Far Hills, New Jersey

Today started out as a bad day, but Mario and Michael Perrotti of M&M Perrotti's Butcher Shop in Far Hills, NJ, have turned that frown upside down with a couple of 2-inch-thick ribeye steaks that Rex grilled for dinner tonight.

This morning, Maddie and London and I were cruising along Peapack Road with the top down, Springsteen on the tape deck singin' Born to Run, and we're all singin' along on our way to Annie's Playhouse Summer Stars camp at the Presbyterian Church in Bernardsville, when one of Far Hills' finest pulled me over by the train station and gave me a ticket...Roxy's Red Convertible was 14 days out of registration. I won't bore you with the details of how horrible The Perpetrator felt all morning, but $46.50 online registration, $54 ticket, unpleasant negotiations with a potential new client, and seven hours later, Roxy's Red Convertible was on the way back down the road to pick up the girls at Annie's in that little shopping center by the Far Hills Post Office. And that's when things started to look up.

When Perrotti's Butcher Shop first opened back in the Spring, I announced it here at Roxiticus Desperate Housewives, but since we do our grocery shopping at Shop Rite in Chester, NJ, we've always counted on Louie at the Chester Meat Market. Anyway, Rex and I have been meaning to give Perrotti's a chance, and today was the day. As he headed in to our office in NYC for a business lunch, Rex asked me to pick up a couple of ribeyes for dinner. Rex likes them extra thick, about two inches, and Mario, one of the butcher-brother owners, offered to cut them fresh for me.

While Mario was cutting the meat, I took a few pictures of the prepared foods and the meats in the refrigerator case, and we got to talking about Perrotti's Butcher Shop, and how I don't cook. More good news! In addition to all the steaks and chops and sausage and Bell & Evans chicken, Perrotti's has an amazing selection of prepared foods, including:

Carne:

• Chicken cutlets, fully cooked (breaded or grilled): $8.99/pound
• Veal cutlets, fully cooked (breaded): $16.99/pound
• Stuffed pork chops (pan seared): $5.99/pound
• Breaded pork chops (pan seared): $4.99/pound
• Stuffed peppers: $3.99/pound
• Chicken parmigiana (16 oz): $10.99
• Chicken romano (14 oz): $10.99
• Chicken marsala (16 oz): $10.99
• Veal marsala (14 oz): $16.99
• Sausage & peppers (1 3/4 lbs*): $8.99
• Sausage 'n' sauce (16 oz*): $6.99
• Meatballs (16 oz): $7.99
• Pork loin 'n' gravy (16 oz*): $8.99
• Meatloaf 'n' gravy (16 oz*): $8.99
• Stuffed cabbage (2 lbs*): $9.99

* All weights before sauces and cheese *

Verdura:

• Eggplant parmigiana (24 oz): $7.99
• Eggplant rollatinni (24 oz): $7.99
• Potatoes oreganato (24 oz): $6.99
• Potatoes & vinegar peppers (24 oz): $6.99
• Green beans (16 oz): $4.99
• Broccoli rabe (16 oz): $7.99
• Sauteed spinach (32 oz): $6.99
• Glazed carrots (12 oz): $4.99

Pasta:

• Lasagna (32 0z) -- cheese, meat, spinach: $10.99
• Stuffed shells (24 oz): $7.99
• Baked ziti (24 oz): $6.99
• Rigatoni bolognese (1 3/4 pounds): $8.99
• Fettucini alfredo (24 oz): $6.99
• Cavetelli & broccoli (24 oz): $6.99
• Manicotti (24 oz): $7.99
• Pierogies: $6.99
• Cheese ravioli (14 oz): $4.49
• Spinach ravioli (14 oz): $5.49
• Meat ravioli (13 oz): $5.49
• Stuffed rigatoni (1 pound): $4.49

Salsa & Minestra:

• Marinara sauce: $5.99/quart or $2.99/pint
• Vodka sauce: $5.99/quart or $2.99/pint
• Spaghetti sauce: $5.99/quart or $2.99/pint
• Meat sauce: $5.99/quart or $2.99/pint
• Pea soup: $6.99/quart or $3.50/pint
• Pasta e fagoli: $6.99/quart or $3.50/pint
• Chicken orzo: $6.99/quart or $3.50/pint
• Beef stew: $10.99/quart or $5.50/pint
• Beef barley: $8.99/quart or $4.50/pint
• Meat chili: $9.99/quart or $4.99/pint

Now I've got to say, bringing any or all of Perrotti's Prepared Foods home, transferring them to a plate or pot, and passing off each tasty dish as my own family recipe is certainly not something Bree would do, but you can bet your Emeril Lagasse Non-Stick All-Clad Saute Pan it is something Roxy would do!

As I was paying for the ribeyes (reasonably priced at $10.99/pound for a total of $32.20 for the two huge steaks), Mario insisted that I take home a free 24 oz sample of his Eggplant Parmigiana, which he promises will be "the best you've ever had." Tomorrow, I'm taking Mario's Eggplant Parmigiana as my contribution to a swim play date and dinner at Susan and Mike's house for a "bake off" against Colonial Pantry in Mendham.

I took all my goodies, left the butcher shop, and crossed the parking lot to pick up London and Maddie at Annie's Playhouse. The girls sang "Love Potion Number Nine" (complete with dance moves) and climbed into the back of the convertible while I told them we had to make a trip to Shop Rite in Bernardsville to pick up baking potatoes because Officer Krupke had foiled my morning shopping trip. Something made me turn around and stick my head in the door of Perrotti's to ask Mario, "You don't know where I can get a baked potato around here, do you?" With a big grin, he said, "Right here," and gave me three of the biggest baking potatoes I've ever seen to be turned into Rex's signature Perfect Baked Potatoes for the girls. Time to head home, singin':

I took my troubles down to Madame Rue
You know that gypsy with the gold-capped tooth
She's got a pad down on Thirty-Fourth and Vine
Sellin' little bottles of Love Potion Number Nine

I told her that I was a flop with chics
I've been this way since 1956
She looked at my palm and she made a magic sign
She said "What you need is Love Potion Number Nine"

She bent down and turned around and gave me a wink
She said "I'm gonna make it up right here in the sink"
It smelled like turpentine, it looked like Indian ink
I held my nose, I closed my eyes, I took a drink

I didn't know if it was day or night
I started kissin' everything in sight
But when I kissed a cop down on Thirty-Fourth and Vine
He broke my little bottle of Love Potion Number Nine

Last but not least, here's a photo of the finished product after Rex worked his magic on the grill, along with Rex's signature Perfect Baked Potato.

Rex is sending me back to Perrotti's tomorrow, with the message that the two-inch ribeyes "charred up" beautifully, and the tender, buttery flavor and texture were extraordinary.

We'll be back!

Naturally, I know where to find Perrotti's when I get a hankering...for the rest of you, I just realized I almost forgot some key information:

M&M Perrotti's is located in the Far Hills Center, next to Country Curtains (in the sadly missed Romo Books location), 27 Route 202 South. Phone: (908) 306-8806.

Hours are Monday-Wednesday & Friday from 9:00am to 6:00pm, Thursday from 9:00am to 7:00pm, Saturday from 8:00am to 4:00pm, closed Sunday.

Roxiticus Desperate Housewives Blog Reader Project

As my loyal Roxiticus Desperate Housewives readers know, I'm expanding the Roxy empire by adding new things to my existing blog, and launching a cool new self-hosted WordPress MU blog community in early August. While I know a bit about some of you because I read your blogs every day, I'm hoping to get to know all of my readers better so that I can picture my audience (in their underwear??) as I write my posts. Please take my Blog Reader Project survey.

Instructions to the Double...Background Leading Up To the Roxiticus Desperate Housewives Third Blogiversary

Roxiticus Desperate Housewives is coming up on its 3-Year Blogiversary on August 5, 2008. Looking through old magazines I've collected haphazardly at our beach house, I came across a stack of papers bound together with bulldogs. The collection turned out to be my August 2005 printout of Instructions to the Double, the blog that inspired me to blog. It now feels like a silly idea to print out a blog, since everyone's banal maundering is readily accessible online. In fact, I've joked with Matt over at MTMD about services I read about in my early blogging days that offered to compile all of a blogger's printed blog posts into a handsome leather-bound volume, and I feel certain that Matt will be surprising me with just such a tribute on August 5th. However, in this case it turns out that I am glad I printed out the hundreds of pages of Instructions to the Double. The blogger, "Tess," deleted most of her blog archives, leaving only a handful of old posts and no trace of her ongoing existence online. So I have the stack of pages that runs for less than a year, from October 7, 2004 to the end of July 2005, here on the beach with me for a blogiversary memorial re-reading. Back in the summer/early fall 2005, I had tracked down "Tess" at her new blog about her master's degree program at the University of Virginia in Charlottesville. But at some point Tess abandoned that blog as well, leaving me wondering what has happened in her life over the past three years.

It also turns out that Tess' writing/blogging style was a rare find. Since I returned to blogging in earnest and surfing other people's blogs (OPB) in February 2008, thanks to BlogExplosion and EntreCard, I have discovered quite a few blogs that I enjoy reading (and exchanging comments) on a regular basis. The Catch-22 with all of my favorite bloggers, however, is that they WANT people to read their blogs. Bloggers who work to drive traffic to their blogs are "writing to be read." Tess' Instructions to the Double blog read like a very well-written personal diary, the memoir of someone who was not aware of her audience.

I'm going to write more about Tess and Instructions to the Double as we count down to the Official Roxiticus Desperate Housewives Third Year Blogiversary....stay tuned.

Instructions to the Double -- the Poem by Tess Gallagher

Instructions to the Double (1976) by Tess Gallagher

So now it's your turn,
little mother of silences, little
father of half-belief. Take up
this face, these daily rounds
with a cabbage under each arm
convincing the multitudes
that a well-made-anything
could save them. Take up
most of all, these hands
trained to an ornate piano
in a house on the other side
of the country.

I'm staying here
without music, without
applause. I'm not going
to wait up for you. Take
your time. Take mine
too. Get into some trouble
I'll have to account for. Walk
into some bars alone
with a slit in your skirt. Let
the men follow you on the street
with their clumsy propositions, their
loud hatred of this and that. Keep
walking. Keep your head
up. They are calling to you-- slut, mother
virgin, whore, daughter, adulteress, lover,
mistress, bitch, wife, cunt, harlot,
betrothed, Jezebel, Messalina, Diana,
Bethdheba, Rebecca, Lucretia, Mary,
Magdelena, Ruth, you-- Niobe,
woman of the tombs.

Don't Stop for anything, not
a caress or a promise. Go
to the temple of the poets, not
the one like a run-down country club
but the one on fire
with so much it wants
to be done with. Say all the last words
and the first: hello, goodbye, yes,
I, no, please, always, never.

If anyone from the country club
asks if you write poems, say
your name is Lizzie Borden.
Show him your axe, the one
they gave you with a silver
blade, your name engraved there
like a whisper of their own.

If anyone calls you a witch,
burn for him; if anyone calls you
less or more than you are
let him burn for you.

It's a dangerous mission. You
could die out there. You
could live forever.

I Got A Bottle

File under, "Kids These Days"...and remind me to share the MySpace Babysitter story another time.

So we're down at the beach in Bay Head, New Jersey, and looking ahead to the month of August, when we will leave behind our full-time nanny in the Roxiticus Valley and Rex and I will attempt to work from the office in our beach house with a little help from teenage babysitters. I made cell phone contact with a nice young rising high school junior, we'll call her Ratatouille, whom my girls have enjoyed tremendously as a babysitter. Ratatoille agrees to help out in August, and I plan to send her a schedule when we'll need her babysitting services. With a smile, I tell Rex how mature and self-assured she seemed compared with some teenagers who never seem to look you in the eye.

Later that night, as we're headed out to a BYOB dinner, I get the following text from Ratatouille: "I got a bottle."

While I eventually decided to ignore Ratatouille's text in the interest of having a babysitter in August, my first inclination was to text back, "So do I, but it's running low...why don't you bring yours over to my porch?"

When I was a teenager, I certainly did my share of underage drinking...my friends and I just didn't have the advantages of technology to betray us.

Ooh...It's Here! Roxy's Canon EOS Rebel XSi Digital SLR

My new Canon EOS Rebel XSi Digital SLR arrived on Thursday morning, and I've got a BIG problem...in less than 48 hours, I've already taken more than 200 of those 12.2 Megapixel photos. I'm going to need a new computer just to store all of these gorgeous shots. I'm really enjoying it...it feels faster than my "old" camera (the Canon Digital Rebel XT from January 2007) and has a bigger screen for reviewing your completed photos.

Anyway, here are a few of my first shots with the new camera...puffy white clouds in the Roxiticus Valley.


A farm near my mom's house that I've been driving by for almost my entire life without stopping to take a picture.

I Knew Him When He Was Johnny Cougar: John Cougar Mellencamp Tonight at PNC Bank Arts Center in Holmdel, New Jersey!

I've had a lot of girls in my life
They never meant that much to me
A good time was always had by all
But those good times, they were fleeting memories
I used to lie to them and then I'd kiss 'em
But I kept them an arm's length away
Well, hey man, now you know me
And look how silly I been acting today
CHORUS
This time I really think I'm in love, I'm in love
This time I think I'm reall in love
This time I really think I'm in love, I'm in love
This time I think I'm really in love
I used to roll down the window
And let the tape deck blow
And look at the honey that I was holding that night
I'd say, "Hey girl, you're the one,"
And then I'd laugh when I'd take her home
You got your arms around my shoulders
You got my soul confused with my heart
You were too smart to believe all those tired lines
And I was too dumb to know what had started
I hope you don't lose that innocent laughter
I hope time doesn't take that away
CHORUS

-- John Cougar Mellencamp "This Time"

London and Maddie Are Ready to Be Summer Stars at Annie's Playhouse in Far Hills, New Jersey

Last year, London and Maddie had a great time at Annie's Playhouse Summer Stars summer camp in Far Hills, New Jersey (actually, while Annie's Playhouse "headquarters" is located in Far Hills, the camp sessions are held at the Presbyterian Church in Bernardsville, New Jersey). Last year, my girls were among the youngest Summer Stars, performing favorites like "We Go Together" from Grease and "We're All In This Together" from High School Musical along with their groups in the summer show.

This year, the girls are starting Annie's Playhouse Summer Stars camp next Monday, July 14th, and I'm really looking forward to another terrific performance on Friday, August 1st. We'll keep you posted!

In addition to Summer Stars, Annie's Playhouse offers classes in Musical Theatre, Dance/Acting, and "Young Starlets." Fall 2008 classes include:

• MUSICAL THEATRE WORKSHOP (separate classes for ages 8-12 and 13+): This specialized performance class will expand skills in music, movement and performance. Singers, actors and dancers will all benefit from the techniques studied here. Students will work with scripted material, providing them with the opportunity to practice and strengthen presentation techniques.
• MUSICAL THEATRE JR. (ages 5-7): The first in Annie's series of musical theatre classes. Students will learn songs, dance, and expand their comfort with performing.
• MUSICAL THEATRE DANCE (all ages?): Get dance skills you need to succeed with comprehensive curriculum in Jazz, Tap and Ballet for the musical stage. One class for all three, or individual Jazz, Tap and Ballet dancing classes available.
• HIP HOP (separate classes for 5-7 and 8-12): This fun-filled class opens the stage door to street dance. This class is for everyone interested in energy driven dancing.
• ACTING: The perfect class to explore and understand the foundations of acting for the stage. Students will be exposed to exercises, monologues and scene work.
• YOUNG STARLETS: Pre-Musical Theatre (ages 3-5), Sing and Play (ages 3-5), Act I (ages 3-5), and Pre-Ballet/Tap (ages 2+)

Annie’s Playhouse is filled with young, hip, up-and-coming artists and working theater professionals who have the cutting edge needed to prepare your child for the future world of musical theater. Annie’s Playhouse offers a widely diverse curriculum of acting, singing, dance, and a variety of musical theater workshops and combo classes as well as private study in voice and instruments. I may look into piano lessons for London and Maddie in September....Santa brought the girls a keyboard for Christmas 2006, and they really enjoy playing simple tunes, but our in-home instructor quit after only two or three lessons because we "took too many vacations!"

Annie's Playhouse also offers extraordinary birthday parties; however they are only for registered Playhouse students.

Annie's Playhouse is owned and operated by Annie Forgione. Annie has over 13 years of professional performance experience. She graduated Summa Cum Laude from the University of Central Florida and holds a B.F.A. in Musical Theatre. Annie is an accomplished performer and an active member of Actors Equity Association. Recently she performed as a Disney princess in various shows in Orlando, Florida. Her favorite roles include Rose Petal in My Perfectly Princess Tea Party at Walt Disney World. Annie developed the interactive show Cinderella’s Princess Court with Walt Disney Entertainment, currently playing in New York City. Annie has been a Broadway Kid since age 10 and has performed in numerous benefits in NYC including Friends of Center Stage at the Hudson Theatre alongside the very popular Kristen Chenoweth. Annie has also provided numerous commercial voice-overs for companies such as Coca-Cola, Metlife, and General Motors. As a certified teacher Annie taught Theatre at Bernards High School and directed productions “I Remember Mama” and the unforgettable “Wizard of Oz.”

Soft Shell Crabs from Sammy's Restaurant in Mendham, NJ...Every Bite as Amazing as Expected!

Last night, Rex and the girls and I went to Sammy's for soft shell crabs...and as you might be able to see from the photo, they were every bite as perfect as we had hoped. This must be a terrible tease for all of our visitors who do not live in the Greater Roxiticus Valley, but if you are from around here, I have three words for you: Get to Sammy's!

Just before we left for 10 days at our beach house in Bay Head, New Jersey, Rex reminded me that soft shell crab season had started, and that Sammy's Restaurant in Mendham, NJ, has the biggest, tastiest soft shell crabs in the entire world. We thought we'd have to rush out to Sammy's that night in late June to be sure to enjoy our soft shells in lemon garlic butter sauce before the short season ended, but I called Sammy's (973-543-7675) and the manager assured me that the soft shell crab season runs safely through July and frequently into early August.

To give you a little background on Sammy's Ye Olde Cider Mill... Every couple of months, Rex & I will be in the mood for a steak, and we'll round up some friends and/or take the girls to Sammy's in Mendham NJ. It's a funny place with no sign to announce itself, a white building on "old" Route 24 (353 Mendham Road West) in Mendham, near Westmont Montessori School.

From Sammy's web site: Established in 1933 and now run by third generation family members, Sam, Phil and MaryAnn Fornaro, Sammy's has outlived most other restaurants and the prohibition era to become a legend in these parts because it consistently serves its clientele the best.

You'll order your food as you walk in the door. The fun starts when they send you down to the bar in the basement, where the kids can play pinball and you can get a start on one of over 120 bottles of fine wine. Sammy's is where we discovered Darioush Cabernet with our friends Susan and Mike, Lynette and Tom, back when we all had kids over at Westmont Montessori and we'd all sneak off together after back-to-school night.

For about a month when they're in season in the summer (starting right now in late June through early August), Sammy's has the most amazing, huge soft shell crabs that they serve in a lemon garlic butter sauce. The rest of the year, we'll order veal chops, steak, lobster, or a little of both. I like Sammy's surf & turf combo because they'll serve a New York strip steak with a lobster, instead of insisting that filet mignon is the only "turf" in the house. Rex and I always start with shrimp scampi Sammy's style and spaghetti with roasted garlic & oil.

There are still plenty of soft shell crabs left for you, so get to Sammy's tonight! If you need directions, you can reach Sammy's by phone: (973) 543-7675.

Roxy's Not Going Home Until They Play Brown Sugar!

In my wild single years, I saw my share of closing times at the Jersey Shore Bars. I'd frequently shout to the band, "I'm not going home 'til you play Brown Sugar!"

As we were preparing for the birth of our first daughter, London, my ob-gyn suggested that Rex and I bring along some favorite CDs to the hospital when it was time to deliver. After many many hours of hard labor, it was time to push, and Rex put Disc Two of the Rolling Stones' Hot Rocks collection on. Seven and a half songs later, London was born.

Why didn't she tell us "I'm not comin' out 'til you play Brown Sugar?"

I'd like to thank Ken Armstrong's Writing Stuff and his "Songs for Guys" post today for the inspiration. I'm also going to go ahead and nominate Ken for Hottest Daddy Blogger and encourage you to check him out and see if you agree.

Baby, It's Hot Outside...Hope My Convertible's AC is Working...

Here in the Roxiticus Valley, we're having a 95 degree heat wave. Not the best time for the AC Compressor in your car to go on the fritz. I went out for a drive in my little red convertible this morning, over the Bernardsville Mountain and through the woods, with the wind blowing through my hair. I had the top down for fun and because, after twelve years, my beloved ragtop's AC doesn't work anymore. Luckily, Air Conditioning Compressor online has all the auto air conditioning parts you'll ever need, with free shipping and a warranty on every part. How can you go wrong?

Now all I need is a mechanic to take a look under my hood.

Tonight's the Night: Awesome Soft Shell Crabs at Sammy's Restaurant in Mendham, New Jersey

Stay away from my window,
Stay away from my back door, too
Disconnect my telephone line...

Tonight's the night...we're going to Sammy's for soft shell crabs!! I'm only disappointed that our good friends, Susan and Mike, will not be able to join us. So...a table for four with lots of garlic, please.

Just before we left for 10 days at our beach house in Bay Head, New Jersey, Rex reminded me that soft shell crab season had started, and that Sammy's Restaurant in Mendham, NJ, has the biggest, tastiest soft shell crabs in the entire world. We thought we'd have to rush out to Sammy's that night in late June to be sure to enjoy our soft shells in lemon garlic butter sauce before the short season ended, but I called Sammy's (973-543-7675) and the manager assured me that the soft shell crab season runs safely through July and frequently into early August.

To give you a little background on Sammy's Ye Olde Cider Mill... Every couple of months, Rex & I will be in the mood for a steak, and we'll round up some friends and/or take the girls to Sammy's in Mendham NJ. It's a funny place with no sign to announce itself, a white building on "old" Route 24 (353 Mendham Road West) in Mendham, near Westmont Montessori School.

From Sammy's web site: Established in 1933 and now run by third generation family members, Sam, Phil and MaryAnn Fornaro, Sammy's has outlived most other restaurants and the prohibition era to become a legend in these parts because it consistently serves its clientele the best.

You'll order your food as you walk in the door. The fun starts when they send you down to the bar in the basement, where the kids can play pinball and you can get a start on one of over 120 bottles of fine wine. Sammy's is where we discovered Darioush Cabernet with our friends Susan and Mike, Lynette and Tom, back when we all had kids over at Westmont Montessori and we'd all sneak off together after back-to-school night.

For about a month when they're in season in the summer (starting right now in late June through early August), Sammy's has the most amazing, huge soft shell crabs that they serve in a lemon garlic butter sauce. The rest of the year, we'll order veal chops, steak, lobster, or a little of both. I like Sammy's surf & turf combo because they'll serve a New York strip steak with a lobster, instead of insisting that filet mignon is the only "turf" in the house. Rex and I always start with shrimp scampi Sammy's style and spaghetti with roasted garlic & oil.

If you need directions, you can reach Sammy's by phone: (973) 543-7675.

I'm getting hungry just thinking about those soft shell crabs, but I'm saving my appetite. Rex just made me a delicious lunch of fresh arugula from the garden, feta cheese, and cherry tomatoes. Not another bite until tonight!

The Nose On Your Face Has Me Laughing Again: The Quilted Heckler Strikes!

Since I am not funny enough to keep all of you entertained all the time, I have posted about The Nose On Your Face, one of my favorite conservative satire discoveries, here on Roxiticus Desperate Housewives, as well as on my Roxiticus Best Blogs site. These boys are good for a laugh every time I stop by via BlogExplosion, and today's TNOYF post is about a librarian with a “McCain=Bush” sign who was removed from a McCain town hall meeting, apparently by the fashion police. Unbeknownst to the Quilted Heckler or the writers of The Nose on Your Face, they've provided me with the most amazing DoItYourselfer suggestion…as my loyal Roxiticus Desperate Housewives readers may or may not remember, Maddie, my 6-year-old has a little monkey quilt she calls “tonky” (name changed to protect the blankie?) that goes everywhere with her. I was wondering what to do when she outgrows it, now I know. I shall make her a quilted jacket in the fine Republican heckler tradition, attacting hot men with handcuffs throughout Amurrica.

And since The Nose on Your Face can't be convinced to participate in the Battle of the Blogs, go ahead and use the next 20 seconds to read their post about the Quilted Heckler and give ROXY your Battle of the Blogs vote!

Speaking of Honeymoons...a Chapter from the Roxiticus Desperate Memoir

Speaking of honeymoons (see PostBoy & MathGirl's Costa Rican Honeymoon post below), my most loyal Roxiticus Desperate Housewives readers have read a chapter or two from the Roxiticus Memoir about Rex & Roxy's honeymoon, but for those who haven't heard the story, here's a blast from the past.

October 1998, Le Maquis -- Porticcio, Corsica:

Wow...what to say?

Yesterday Rex and I took the ferry from Santa Teresa in Sardinia to Bonifacio on Corsica. From there, a woman taxi driver picked us up and started the 2 1/2 hour drive to Porticcio. Not 20 minutes into our drive, she tried to pass another car (or was it a bus?) on a curve, didn't make it back into her lane in time, hit an oncoming car and lost control of our taxi, swerving from side to side and eventually flipping our car over in the ditch on our side of the road. I didn't say anything the whole time... I was paralyzed with fear. Rex & I had both worn our seatbelts, which kept us safely hanging upside down from our seats. We undid our seatbelts and somehow crawled out the door of the car. I was bleeding from my elbow, which later required two stitches, but otherwise not a scratch.

I am thankful for so many little twists of fate: that we were not in a convertible, that we were not further along the road to Porticcio (we could have gone off a cliff), that I was not pregnant... so many little things that made the difference between life and death. I continue to pray, not certain who or what God is, but believing that someone is watching over us.

The ambulance and doctor came, oddly not very helpful...it was frightening to be in an accident in France, unable to communicate in French with most people (natives) unable to speak much English. The doctor and nurses were quite nice, very concerned that we not be afraid. The doctor stitched up my elbow, worried that it would sting -- after my brush with death, I was much more afraid to get into another taxi than I was of ANYTHING a doctor could do to me -- 2 stitches was nothing.

My greatest concern was for Rex. I did not want to be away from him. It seemed strange to me to know so quickly that I would be okay but not to know for sure what Rex felt. As it turned out, I think he was just shaken up, maybe even more than I was. As a woman, I am allowed and encouraged to express fear. As a man, I think Rex was grateful that I expressed enough fear for both of us. For example, I asked the policeman who took our report, as well as the nurse who helped with my stitches, to explain (in French) to our new taxi driver what had happened, and that he must drive very slowly and not pass any other cars. I know that Rex felt exactly the same fear of the taxi, but only I am allowed to express it.

Such a strange feeling, very similar to when I got hit by the taxi crossing 42nd Street to FedEx two years ago (1996). My thoughts then and now have been that such a stupid mistake could have put an end to such a wonderful life...but didn't. So I am grateful for another chance.

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PostBoy and MathGirl: Planning A Honeymoon in Costa Rica

Rex's son, PostBoy, recently announced his engagement to the lovely, gracious MathGirl. They plan to marry in February 2009, followed by a Costa Rican honeymoon.

Since our good friends Brent and Fitz travelled to Costa Rica last summer, they are lending a hand in planning the couple's trip, complete with helicopter volcano tours and ripcord travel through the jungles and canyons.

Brent's first tip is to stay at the Makanda Hotel in Miguel Antonio., and to use Nature Air prop planes to get around the country instead of wasting valuable time driving on the rutted and curvy roads.

We'll be posting about Costa Rica here from time to time over the next six months, and would welcome your comments and suggestions if you've travelled to or live there.

Roxy's Got the Look

Walking like a man
Hitting like a hammer
She's a juvenile scam
Never was a quitter
Tasty like a raindrop
She's got the look

Heavenly bound
Cause heaven's got a number
When she's spinning me around
Kissing is a colour
Her loving is a wild dog
She's got the look

She's got the look, she's got the look-
She's got the look, she's got the look-
What in the world can make a brown-eyed girl turn blue
When everything I'll ever do, I'll do for you
And I go: la la la la la
She's got the look

Fire in the ice
Naked to the t-bone
Is a lover's disguise
Banging on the head drum
Shaking like a mad bull
She's got the look

Swaying to the band
Moving like a hammer
She's a miracle man
Loving is the ocean
Kissing is the wet sand
She's got the look

She's got the look, she's got the look-
She's got the look, she's got the look-
What in the world can make a brown-eyed girl turn blue
When everything Ill ever do, Ill do for you
And I go: la la la la la
She's got the look

And she goes:
Na na na na na,
Na na na na na na,
Na na na na na,
Na na na na na na,
Na na na na na na na na,
She's got the look

-- "The Look" by Roxette

Heard that song by Roxette on my Sirius Satellite in the Jeep on the way in to New York City today and it always takes me back to my wild single days when I gave Jersey Shore bar boyz "the look" to get their attention and spark their interest. My other approach to non-verbal flirting was to keep my eyes on my notebook instead of directly on the prey, and let them approach me. I wrote haiku in all the best Jersey Shore bars, from Donovan's in Sea Bright to The Stone Pony in Asbury Park.

Redhead at the bar
Really knows her syllables
Let's buy her a beer

Just the other day, the Ultimate Flirting Championship brought to us by Extreme Style by VO5 took me back to those days. You can try it out by clicking the widget below...and let me tell you, Roxy had Victory Hair by the end of the competition!