An Invitation from London and Maddie to Dance with Them at Garden State Ballet in Randolph, New Jersey

Now that we're back to school, London and Maddie are happy to be back to ballet lessons with Miss Katie at Garden State Ballet in Randolph, New Jersey. This year will be their third year with Miss Katie at GSB, and Rex and I are quite proud and pleased with their progress…from "Baby Blue" to "White" to "Pink." Many of their friends are back for another year, and I received the following e-mail from Jody Jaron, Director of Garden State Ballet, and thought I would share it with you and issue an open invitation from London and Maddie to join the fun (as well as serious dance training and technique) at Garden State Ballet.

Dear Parents,

Welcome to a new year at the School of the Garden State Ballet! I hope you and your child have a wonderful year of dance. We are all working hard to make it the best year ever.

The reason why most parents come to us is because their children have a desire to dance. From there, parents want a school that will teach their children "how to dance." Many parents have found that a majority of the dance schools have one goal in mind: the recital at the end of the year, which leads to a huge investment in tickets, costumes and whatever. At the School of the Garden State Ballet, we strive to teach your child the proper technique, something we build on year after year. Your child learns about ballet and technique as she or he develops a true understanding of ballet and dance right from the beginning. At our concert, the children will demonstrate what they have learned and if you are new to our school, you will be impressed by the progress your child has made. Ballet is a discipline that will help your child throughout life. AND they will enjoy their classes and have fun. Many people think that ballet is too serious for their youngsters but if you watch your child light up when he or she goes off to class and comes out afterwards, you know she or he had a great learning experience.

With this is mind, I am reaching out to you to invite friends with children to come join our GSB family. The majority of our students and their parents come to us because someone had told them about our school - someone like you. We still have space available in several of our classes. If you know someone who has a child that would enjoy our program, please tell them to come in and watch part of a class.

We also welcome your child to "bring a friend to class." The friend can stay for the whole class and watch or participate, whichever he or she chooses. Hopefully he or she will enjoy the class and want to be part of this great experience as well.

Have a great year. Please always feel free to contact me if you have questions or concerns.

Sincerely,
Jody Jaron
Director, Garden State Ballet

So, here's your invitation….call Garden State Ballet and make plans for your child to attend her (or his) first class, and be sure to tell them London and Maddie sent you!

While London and Maddie attend dance classes in Randolph, NJ, Garden State Ballet has three New Jersey locations: Randolph, Rutherford, and Newark. You'll also find classes for all ages and abilities. For pre-schoolers and kindergarteners, the 45-minute "Baby Blue" class provides a fun, musical introduction to ballet. In first or second grade, children move up to (or start with) a 60-minute "White" beginners' class. London and Maddie advanced this year to a 90-minute "Pink" class, more challenging but not yet "intermediate." As the dancers get older (middle school and high school), they tend to get more involved with Garden State Ballet, dancing several days each week and adding pointe classes and/or modern dance workshops to their intermediate schedule. Garden State Ballet's end of year recital showcases the talents of every age group. At the intermission, London and Maddie and the younger dancers come down to sit with us in the audience, and together we admire (and aspire to) the impressive performances of the strongest dancers in nine or ten professionally choreographed modern dance numbers. I hope we'll see you there in June 2009!

Rex's Recipes: Pistachio Crusted Rack of Lamb, with a Little Help from Perrotti's Butcher in Far Hills, New Jersey

Way back when Rex and I were first living together in NYC's West Village, we would occasionally attend a "celebrity chef" cooking class at Macy's DeGustibus program. Rex paid close attention to the recipes and preparation, while I enjoyed one delicious meal after the next. On one such occasion, we had the good fortune of cooking with Patrick O'Connell, the chef and proprietor of the Inn at Little Washington in Washington, Virginia, and taking home one of my all-time favorite recipes: Pistachio Crusted Grilled Baby Lamb Chop with Carrot Ginger Essence.

This past Saturday, as part of our weekend-long celebration of our tenth anniversary, Rex decided to prepare a rack of lamb for our Bay Head neighbors, Jango and Dorothy Parker, who provided the wine (including an amazing 30 year old cabernet) for our festive evening. After a perfect anniversary dinner at the Bernards Inn in Bernardsville, NJ on Friday night, we started our Saturday in the Roxiticus Valley. Rex usually gets his racks of lamb from Louie at the Chester Meat Market, but since we were travelling through Far Hills to get to the beach, I reminded him to give Perrotti's a try.

So I'm going to start with Patrick O'Connell's "incredibly sophisticated" recipe (Rex's notes on the recipe from 1996), and take you through step-by-step, along with lots of photos, how Rex applied it to a beautiful rack of lamb from Perrotti's Butcher Shop in Far Hills, New Jersey.

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Hips Still Don't Lie: The Latest on Roxy's Back-to-School Fitness Program

It's been a bit more than two weeks since I decided to get "back-to-school" with a brand new body and I have to say, the results have been better than I expected. I've stuck with my plan to work out every day that I don't go in to our New York City office. My goal was to lose a pound per week until I get down from a starting point of 160 to my fighting weight of 135. In the first two weeks, I lost five pounds, so right now I'm weighing in around 155. I know the weight is easiest to lose in the early going, so I'm going to try to continue to lose a pound per week from the "new base" of 155.

So far, I've been using only the elliptical trainer in our basement gym, progressing quickly from 6 minutes X 4 on the first days to 10 minutes X 3 last Friday, though still at the lowest levels (1 and 3 on a scale of 20) of exertion. While I'm not bored yet, it may be time to add some fun to my everyday routine with a video-based program like XFLOWSION.

With a revolutionary TRIPLE TRAINING™ approach, XFLOWSION™ is the only exercise program that efficiently and effectively provides three workouts in one convenient program, combining the proven best moves from martial arts, power yoga, and dance. For someone like me, with very little time to spend in the gym, XFLOWSION™ promises to deliver jaw-dropping results in one-third time. As Shakira reminds me every time I work out, hips don't lie, and neither will my abs!

Celebrity trainer Eric Paskel, who has shaped up some of the hottest bodies in Hollywood, combines his leading-edge fitness and psychology background to give us the plateau blast, that combats the frustration of working out and seeing early results that somehow just stop while the last pounds refuse to budge. XFLOWSION™'s fresh, constantly shifting moves are specifically designed to promote continuous fat burning and muscle toning. While my body keeps improving, I'm much less likely to get bored.

The price seems right... for three payments of $19.95 (use promotional code FREESH for free shipping and handling), XFLOWSION™ offers four DVD workouts:

• Live in Hollywood, filmed in high definition, with 5 cameras, 5:1 surround sound and a live band;
• Calm Down Dog, a restorative and gentle yoga-centric workout to reduce stress (did someone say stock market?);
• Body Blast, a total body workout focused on toning, strenth, and flexibility; and
• Amazing Abs, a high-intensity core workout.

Roxy's ready to sweat, sculpt and stretch my body to total transformation, from head to toe, inside and out with XFLOWSION... how about you?

Rex and Roxy's Perfect Tenth Anniversary Dinner at the Bernards Inn in Bernardsville, New Jersey

I'm sitting out on our porch in Bay Head, New Jersey, finishing up the weekend-long celebration of our tenth wedding anniversary, and reflecting on our perfect Friday evening at the Bernards Inn in Bernardsville, New Jersey.

London and Maddie were giggling about our plans all day, excitedly insisting that I must wear my "poufy black dress" with the feathers at the bottom. All three girls wore fancy black dresses, and we headed out for our 7pm reservation, arriving at about 7:15pm. We started the evening with a minor disappointment...Rex had asked for a table for four near the piano, overlooking the bar, but we could see that someone else's wine had already been set up there. Later, after the other party arrived and the silver-haired ladies covered their ears and abandoned "our" table in favor of a quieter spot in the back, the Maître d' came over and asked if we'd like to move, explaining that the gentleman reserves that table every Friday night, but that his guests wanted to sit elsewhere. At that point, the girls were settled into their coloring (brand new abstract art coloring books that Rex and I picked up at the Jewish Museum in New York City earlier in the week), so we stayed where we were.

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Rex and Roxy Celebrate Our Tenth Anniversary Tonight at the Bernards Inn in Bernardsville, New Jersey

Wow. I can't believe it's been ten years since Rex and I were married on the beach in Bay Head, New Jersey, but it's true: Rex and I are celebrating our tenth wedding anniversary tonight. We're taking the girls with us for dinner at the Bernards Inn in Bernardsville, New Jersey, one of our favorite restaurants for a real celebration. I'm a bit busy at work today, tying up loose ends before the weekend, but I'll take some pictures tonight and try to share the experience with you from the beach on Saturday.

Say It's Not So....Summer Can't Be Ending This Weekend!

You've heard me say it before, but I find it incredibly hard to get off the beach and into the "back to school" frame of mind. Tonight, Rex and I are headed out to meet London and Maddie's teachers on Back to School Night at Mendham Township Elementary School, but I'm still dreaming about our family beach vacation in Bay Head, New Jersey....

The whole month of August meant relaxing days when London and Maddie slept late (now their alarm goes off at 7:30am), strolled to Mueller's on Bridge Avenue to pick up crumb buns for breakfast, and came back to paint and sell seashells until lunchtime. Rex and I worked all morning in our comfy beach house office, then joined the girls for a late lunch and headed out to the beach for sand, surf, sun and fun.

The folks who run Morey's Piers -- the largest amusement piers in the world, located on the boardwalk in Wildwood, New Jersey -- seem to agree that the summer's not over until it's over. If you're lucky enough to have a free weekend to get to the beach, or better yet the ability to take a spontaneous Monday off, Morey's Piers offers over 100 exciting amusement park rides and Wildwood attractions, including two large beachfront waterparks, kiddie rides and roller coasters. September is a great time to avoid the long theme park lines and enjoy a classic seaside amusement park with your family. Rex and the girls and I are headed to the beach in Bay Head for the next bunch of weekends, but you can visit the Morey's Piers web site for weekly specials and to find hotels and motels and plan your visit to Wildwood.

Mendham Township School District Welcomes New Superintendent Kristopher Harrison

Last night, London and Maddie came home with the following exciting memo from the Mendham Township Board of Education in their "backpack mail":

In the Spring of 2008, the [Mendham Township] Board of Education embarked on a mission to hire a new superintendent. At that time, we solicited input from the community, faculty and staff to determine the qualities each desired in a new leader. After considering that input and undergoing a thorough screening process, we are pleased to announce that Mr. Kristopher Harrison has been appointed to th position of Superintendent of Schools. Mr. Harrison joins us directly from the South Orange/Maplewood School District, a district with over 5, 000students, where he served in a number of capacities, most recently as Principal of Maplewood Middle School for five years. Prior to that , Mr. Harrison served for two years as principal in an elementary school and was a middle school assistant principal for one year in the same district. When in the classroom, Mr. Harrison served as an elementary and middle school teacher in Clinton Township.

Mr. Harrison is noted as a highly regarded administrator who seeks to work in an engaging and collaborative manner with students, faculty, and the community -- key qualities you noted in your feedback. He has also demonstrated that he is a dynamic leader who will bring energy, passion and a sense of commitment to our school system so we can continue to build upon the excellent educational experience we as a community expect and our children deserve. Mr. Harrison has been recognized nationally for his educational leadership abilities by the Association for Supervision and Curriculum Development (ASCD), by being named an Emerging Leader. In this capacity, Mr. Harrison will collaborate with an international group of leaders to influence education-related legislation.

Mr. Harrison's first day with the district will be November 16, 2008. Through that time, Interim Superintendent Catherine Mozak will continue her great work. We would also like to take this opportunity to thank Ms. Mozak for her leadership, experience and valuable judgment as Interim Superintendent. Thanks in large part to her, our schools got off to a great start this year and are in excellent position for a seamless leadership transition. Ms. Mozak has been a joy to work with and we will miss her.

Thank you for your Support.
Mendham Township Board of Education

Please join us in welcoming our new Superintendent at 7:00 p.m. on Thursday, September 23, 2008 in the Elementary School Media Center.

I hope I can get a babysitter that evening, as I look forward to meeting our new Superintendent of Schools, Kristopher Harrison. Here's hoping he picks up right where Dr. Christine Johnson left off in her quest for academic excellence in the Mendham Township Schools.

9/19/08 update: Anonymous was kind enough to stop by and leave a link to a Maplewood site where the community is lamenting their loss and praising Kris Harrison's work as a principal there:
http://www.southorangevillage.com/vc/comments.php?DiscussionID=27844&page=1#Item_20

Roxy Due for a Roxio Digital Makeover?

While I feel confident that I do an excellent job of documenting our family's special moments with my Canon digital SLRs as well as my Sony digital video camera, I'm not so strong when it comes to organizing all of the photos and getting my videos in a form that we can share, either online here on my blog or with Grammy and Grandmom on their own TV sets. So maybe it's time to turn to Roxio Extreme Digital Makeover, a fun spirited makeover show dedicated to helping the average Rex (or Roxy) get the most out of their digital lives. The experts, Zoey and Chris, shown in action in the video clip below, are ready to help put together a fun multimedia show for a special occasion or just for laughs.



So far, Zoey and Chris have done two Roxio Extreme Digital Makeovers that you can check out online: Wedding Day Crunch and A Walk in the Park. I like the one about the wedding, where Michael and his fiancée Monika put together a multimedia show that chronicles their lives, using their shoeboxes full of photos (I can totally relate!), and play it for guests during their wedding reception. Now I have the opportunity to become the star of the show (and you do, too) just by entering the contest. In addition to winning a makeover, there are prizes like an HDTV, cameras and more. I guess I'm up against the clock if I want to have my digital makeover in time to present it to Rex as a 10th wedding anniversary gift this Friday...wish me luck!

What Type of Blogger Are You?

I found this little test over on Mariuca's blog (she's a "Pundit Blogger" and thought I'd give it a try. Turns out I'm a Life Blogger...I think it fits.

You Are a Life Blogger!

Your blog is the story of your life - a living diary. If it happens, you blog it. And you make it as entertaining as possible. You may be guilty of over-sharing a bit on your blog, but you can't help it. Your life is truly an open book. Or in this case, an open blog!

What Kind of Blogger Are You?

Back to School (and Soccer) with the Sproutwells!

I've mentioned before that I take a bit of liberty with this blog's title, Roxiticus Desperate Housewives, as I'm neither desperate nor a housewife. I'm a hard-working investment banking mom, happily married to Rex (10 years on Friday!). And now, the opportunity to take that little white lie a step further by calling myself a "soccer mom" has presented itself. While London and Maddie played Kiddie Soccer and U.K. Elite Petite Soccer when they were in pre-school, thankfully soccer is one of the activities they dropped when London started kindergarten two years ago. I like a lot of action in my sports, and even professional soccer doesn't have enough action for me when compared with basketball or tennis, for example.

The lastest episode of The Sproutwells features a "legitimate" soccer mom in action while her lettuce daughter "uses her head." Click on the video below for a good laugh to start your week.



While Ruby Red, the lettuce daughter, got her pink soccer uniform by saving her points on FreshFunds.com, you don't have to be a soccer mom to start accumlating points towards prizes or charity donations with freshfunds. You'll gain points every time you buy Chiquita Fruit and Veggie Bites, Fresh Express Gourmet Café Salads, and Fresh Express Packaged Salads. Maybe London and Maddie can save enough points to get their pink tennis uniforms from FreshFunds.

Church Is Not A Summer Sport...Getting Back to Hilltop Presbyterian Church in Mendham, New Jersey

Some days I'm just not role model material for my two girls, London and Maddie. I was raised as a good Baptist and even won a Bible passage memorization contest to attend summer sleepaway church camp for a week during my middle school years (I was almost sent home from camp for using too many naughty words, regrettably not for fulfilling my fantasies of sneaking off with PeeJay, the swim instructor). However, since reaching adulthood, I don't make it to church as often as I'd like. Up until last year, Rex and I were pretty much "Christmas and Easter" members of Fifth Avenue Presbyterian in New York City, and later began attending the children's Christmas pageant at Hilltop Church after moving to the Roxiticus Valley, but we felt it was important that London and Maddie grow up with church as part of their lives. The girls started Sunday School at Hilltop Presbyterian Church in Mendham, New Jersey in September 2007, and Rex and I joined the church in January 2008. We made it to church pretty consistently from November through April, but the road to Hell is paved with good intentions, and I'm afraid I may have let it slip to my impressionable daughters that "church is not a summer sport." While I know there's a Religious Right that would insist that I need to follow their rules of worship, I do believe that we find God within us and wherever we go, and I feel His presence often when I'm spending time with my family on the beach in Bay Head, New Jersey.

Last Sunday, September 7th, marked our family's triumphant return to Hilltop Presbyterian Church after a summer of neglect. We had stayed in Mendham last weekend to attend an awesome Saturday night 40th birthday party ("it could lead to dancing") for a good friend, but still managed to get up in time for church and Sunday School at 9:30 the next morning. Turns out it was Rally Day at Hilltop Church... a celebratory way of launching the new "Sunday School Year" with brunch, fun and games after the church service. Our Director of Music Ministries, Tom Berdos, led the choir and congregation in raising a joyful noise unto the Lord with opening singing that included "Shine, Jesus, Shine" and "The Name of the Lord" and "Days of Elijah" and finally "Crown Him with Many Crowns."

"Behold He comes! Riding on the clouds! Shining like the sun! At the trumpet call. Lift your voice! It's the year of jubilee! And out of Zion's hill salvation comes!"

We were back again today, and Pastor Diane delivered an inspirational sermon "The First and the Last" that started with the concept of "Backwards Day," an event that London and Maddie enjoy when it comes to Mendham Township Elementary School. Today, London sang during youth choir practice after Sunday School (Maddie only went along "to watch"), so maybe she'll get to sing in church later in the year.

We'll be more consistent church members from November through April, so please join us at Hilltop Presbyterian Church, 14 Hilltop Road, Mendham, NJ. Phone: (908) 543-4012. Sunday 9:30am service in the Sanctuary, 11:00am informal service in Fellowship Hall at Hilltop House. Children can attend the 9:30am service and disperse to their Sunday School classes after Pastor Diane's "Time with the Children."

Rex and Roxy Share a Delicious Lunch at Equus Restaurant in Bernardsville, New Jersey

The girls were busy at school and we didn't have any business conference calls scheduled on Friday afternoon, so Rex and I decided to slip away to drop off a donation at the Visiting Nurses Rummage Sale in Far Hills, pick up a case of wine at Gary's and to try out Equus, a new-ish restaurant in Bernardsville, New Jersey. Mysteriously, the Equus web site claims that they were "established 1848," but my recollection is Spring 2008. Before that, the building housed a not-very-good pizza and casual food establishment called the Stone Tavern where Rex and the girls and I had some of the worst steamed clams in our family history.

Luckily, Equus is a dramatic improvement over its predecessor. We looked over the menu and decided that, while I was ravenous from my morning workout and the descriptions were so good that we could eat almost anything on the lunch menu, we would stick with two appetizers each. I started with the Crispy Fried Calamari with sambol aioli & wasabi honey drizzle ($10)...it was quite good and the wasabi really had a nice kick to it. As my entree, I enjoyed the Tuna & Rice Paper Wrap appetizer with cucumber & green papaya slaw with nuok chem sauce ($14)...there were four pieces, enough for two people, so I shared half with Rex. Now, here comes trouble...our waiter didn't have any menus that we could take home, promising that the menus are all on the Equus web site, but so far I haven't found either of Rex's dishes online. His first appetizer was a "perfectly executed" pulled pork over cornbread pancake that disappointed Rex only because he remembered (too late) that he doesn't really enjoy cornmeal based items such as tortillas or corn muffins. Rex's second dish was his favorite -- charred tuna. I'm afraid I didn't take any pictures of the food, just the surroundings, which gave Equus just the right ambiance.

Hips Don't Lie: Roxy's Workout Program Update

Today concludes the first week of Roxy's back-to-school workout program, and I have to say, so far, it's been a success. While I'm usually quite the procrastinator about getting down to our basement gym, I worked out 5 of 7 days on the elliptical trainer. It felt so good the last two days as I worked out to my hip-hop playlist that I could feel it in my hips....and as Shakira says, Hips Don't Lie!





Ladies up in here tonight
No fighting, no fighting
We got the refugees up in here
No fighting, no fighting

Shakira, Shakira

I never really knew that she could dance like this
She makes a man want to speak Spanish,
Como se llama, bonita, mi casa, su casa
Shakira, Shakira

Oh baby when you talk like that
You make a woman go mad
So be wise and keep on
Reading the signs of my body

And I'm on tonight
You know my hips don't lie
And I'm starting to feel it's right
All the attraction, the tension
Don't you see baby, this is perfection

Hey Girl, I can see your body moving
And it's driving me crazy
And I didn't have the slightest idea
Until I saw you dancing

And when you walk up on the dance floor
Nobody cannot ignore the way you move
your body, girl
And everything so unexpected - the way
you right and left it
So you can keep on shaking it

I never really knew that she could dance like this
She makes a man want to speak Spanish
Como se llama, bonita, mi casa, su casa
Shakira, Shakira

Oh baby when you talk like that
You make a woman go mad
So be wise and keep on
Reading the signs of my body

And I'm on tonight
You know my hips don't lie
And I am starting to feel you boy
Come on let's go, real slow
Don't you see baby asi es perfecto

Oh I know I am on tonight my hips don't lie
And I'm starting to feel it's right
All the attraction, the tension
Don't you see baby, this is perfection
Shakira, Shakira

Oh boy, I can see your body moving
Half animal, half man
I don't, don't really know what I'm doing
But you seem to have a plan
My will and self restraint
Have come to fail now, fail now
See, I am doing what I can, but I can't so
you know
That's a bit too hard to explain

Baila en la calle de noche
Baila en la calle de dia
Baila en la calle de noche
Baila en la calle de dia

I never really knew that she could dance like this
She makes a man want to speak Spanish
Como se llama, bonita, mi casa, su casa
Shakira, Shakira

Oh baby when you talk like that
You know you got me hypnotized
So be wise and keep on
Reading the signs of my body

Señorita, feel the conga, let me see you
move like you come from Colombia

Mira en Barranquilla se baila asi, say it!
Mira en Barranquilla se baila asi

Yeah
She's so sexy every man's fantasy
a refugee like me back with the Fugees
from a 3rd world country
I go back like when 'pac carried crates for
Humpty Humpty
I need a whole club dizzy
Why the CIA wanna watch us?
Colombians and Haitians
I ain't guilty, it's a musical transaction
No more we do snatch ropes
Refugees run the seas 'cause we own our
own boats

I'm on tonight, my hips don't lie
And I'm starting to feel you boy
Come on let's go, real slow
Baby, like this is perfecto

Oh, you know I'm on tonight and my
hips don't lie
And I'm starting to feel it's right
The attraction, the tension
Baby, like this is perfection

Halloween Is On Its Way, but London and Maddie Have No Costumes!

Halloween, the masquerading time of the year, is almost here. Rex, London, Maddie and I all love Halloween and we take it very seriously with our family's participation in the Bay Head Halloween Parade, which happens every year on the Sunday before Halloween (even if Halloween falls on a Sunday). This year the parade is scheduled for Sunday, October 26th, which leaves us with about 45 days to plan our costumes.

Last year, London dressed up as Hannah Montana; Maddie was her little known sleeping beauty of a sister, Aurora (Montana); Rex was Maddie's handsome prince; and I was Maleficent, the wicked 13th fairy who was not invited to Aurora's christening. I threatened to re-use my costume at my niece Candy's black tie wedding.

The year before, London was the Little Mermaid, Ariel, as a bride; Maddie was Little Red Riding Hood; I was Little Red's Grandmom; and Rex was the Big Bad Wolf. You can see Maddie holding our family trophy in the photo on the left.

This year, Maddie had hoped to be Binah, one of Madonna's English Roses, but it proved too difficult to enlist four of her friends to be the rest of the English Roses, so we're back to square one. I thought it would be fun if they dressed up as London and Maddie from the Suite Life of Zack and Cody, but it turns out they don't make Suite Life costumes, only pillowcases! Now I'm sure my blogosphere buddy LadyJava would approve of the pillowcases over the girls' heads for blog photos, but I'm not sure about trick-or-treating! Even without the pre-packaged costumes, I still like the idea, so we'll have to check out the halloween costume stores to see if we can pull London and Maddie's outfits together.

The girls found grown-up Barbie and Ken costumes in one of the catalogs, and they're trying to talk Rex and me into it...believe it or not, it's not much of a stretch for either of us...Rex thinks he might even have some of his own clothes from the 70's that would work.

Roxy’s Reads -- Raising Lifelong Learners: A Parent’s Guide by Lucy Calkins with Lydia Bellino

Yesterday, Rex and I headed in to our NYC office, and my current hardcover page turner, The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger, was too heavy to lug onto the train. So I picked up Raising Lifelong Learners: A Parent's Guide by Lucy Calkins with Lydia Bellino, at the recommendation of our elementary school principal, Michael Craver. Way back in March, Principal Craver had given an impressive presentation to interested parents about the role parents play in educating their children. Inspired, I bought the book, but just never seemed to pick it up. Today's train ride gave me plenty of time to read, and plenty of time to develop my New Year's resolutions for the Back-to-School New Year. I was hooked by the first chapter, "Talk: The Foundation of Literacy."

I'm going to try to share the first passage that sparked my interest. Lucy Calkins writes:

When my son Miles was three, I visited all the preschools in our town in search of the perfect one. I was particularly intrigued by a place about which I'd heard both rave reviews and critical comments. I couldn't wait to see it for myself. I arrived at the school very early that autumn morning. The classroom was almost empty, save for a cluster of little girls who sat at one table rolling and pummeling clay. The director was nowhere in sight, so I pulled my chair near the girls and listened.

One girl was drumming her fingers on the surface of what appeared to be a pond. "The wind is whooshing the waves," she said. The next girl plopped three blobs of clay onto the now-dappled surface of the pond. "The baby ducks are looking for their mom," she added. Then, in a high-pitched baby duck voice, she called, "Mommy! Mommy!"

At this point, the director of the school arrived and motioned for me to join her. Together we stood, eavesdropping as the three girls spun their tale of the lost baby ducks. "They looked in the tall grass," one child said, moving her three blobs to the pond's edge. Then she shook her head despondently and sighed. "No mother."

The director of the school pointed to the girls and stage-whispered, "This is where it all starts, you know. This is essential for their writing."

My heart leapt. "Yes!" I thought. "She knows, she knows, she knows." I could have hugged her. But my heart leapt too soon.

The director held up her hand, and began to move her fingers in the air as if she were kneading bread. "Yep," she said, "It all starts here. We begin exercising their fingers with soft playdough, then move on to the stiffer beeswax clay, then to the really stiff clay… and by that time, their fingers are strong enough to work the pencil." I stared at her, aghast, silent. "Yep." She nodded with assurance. "It's all in the fingers, it's all in the fingers."

I didn't even stay the morning. And from that day on, as I traveled from one nursery school to another, I looked with a new sense of direction. Whether children were building towers with blocks, making masks with paper bags, or sculpting duck ponds with playdough, I listened to hear whether the adults who were there were celebrating the talk, the emerging stories…

In one school after another, I paid particular attention to the teachers' attitudes toward children's talk. I did this because, yes, indeed, that duck story was foundational to those girls' growth as writers, and as readers, thinkers, problem-solvers, and world builders. Had the director of that school meant what I initially thought she meant, had she truly understood that the story those girls created around their three blobs of clay was foundational to their later writing, reading and learning, I would probably have enrolled my son in her school….

Yes, Ms. Nursery School Director. It all starts here, with those girls playing with clay, and with the rhythms and sounds of language. It all starts with those girls re-enacting the age-old search for a place to call home; with them collaborating to make a story.

Rex and I have been fortunate to find terrific educators since we moved out to the Roxiticus Valley. London and Maddie started pre-school at Westmont Montessori in September 2004, where amazing teachers like Kim Koch encourage the children to explore their world, learn, and follow their imagination wherever it takes them. Once it came time for kindergarten, Mendham Township Elementary School picked up where Westmont Montessori left off. While there are some frustrating limitations to the public school system, London and Maddie have been fortunate to have terrific teachers who nurture their language development.

Lucy Calkins goes on to emphasize the importance of talk in the home, and the ways she has used talk in her own home as her two boys grew up from babies to toddlers to school kids with backpacks, when such "deliberate support for oral language development stops….We teach our children to talk quietly, to talk less, and to stay out of the way." Calkins shares some studies and statistics that indicate that American mothers spend less than 30 minutes a day talking with their children, while fathers may spend less than 30 minutes a week talking with their children. In contrast, the average adult in the U.S. spends 30 hours a week watching the television. I remember Rex taking note back in March when Principal Craver raised this point in his presentation, but I think both of us soon lost our focus on this important message. None of our family members spends much time watching television. In fact, we went without it for the month of August at the beach. However, I think of all the hours I spend outside of my 8:30am to 6:30pm investment banking day doing things that take me away from talking with my children… paying bills or shopping online, checking e-mail, and of course, "Mommy is always blogging!" When we had our good friends Lynette and Tom and their twins down to our beach house in Bay Head, NJ, their kids actually wrote anonymous notes to each parent: "Tom, your wife is nice but she spends too much time on the phone. Lynette, we like your husband but he spends too much time on his computer." While I didn't receive one of these anonymous missives, I am every bit as guilty of trying to multi-task at the expense of conversation.

Rex and I are fortunate that London and Maddie don't let our grown-up activities stop them from indulging in creative play. The girls spend hours acting out elaborate stories with their American Girl dolls, Barbies, and Polly Pockets dolls, calling out "act your people" when Mommy or Aunt Veg doesn't understand how to play the game. Although I get a little crazy when I find pricey doll-size outfits strewn about the house, and tomboy Roxy doesn't have a clue where they got the girly girl gene, I wouldn't trade their collaborative, imaginative play for anything in the world.

Lucy Calkins asks, "Why can't we find time to talk with our children?" and she goes on to answer:

Part of the reason is that by the time our toddlers are of school age, we take their talk for granted. We have turned all our attention to their reading and writing, not realizing that talk is still the motor that propels their intellectual development. It is through talk that children learn to follow and tell stories, understand logical sequences, recognize causes, anticipate consequences, explore options, and consider motives. It is through talk that our children learn about barometers, mortgages, civil rights, psychotherapy, and the Roman Empire. It is through talk that our children learn that their observations, hunches and insights are interesting and worth developing. It is through talk that our children learn about empathy, generosity, forgiveness – about walking a mile in another person's moccasins. Talk matters, and it's not happening enough in our homes…

And if we're not talking with our children, then no one is, because study after study has shown that schools do not support our children's oral language development. Researcher Gordon Wells monitored closely the talk 20 children from a wide range of socioeconomic backgrounds engaged in at home and school. He found that even children from the most "linguistically deprived" homes still got far more support at home for language development than in school.

To be continued....

Roxy

Back to School with London and Maddie... Means Lots of Homework for Mom

Mendham Township Elementary School opened its doors to London and Maddie and about 500 kindergarten through fourth graders last Thursday, and the girls are quite excited to be back at school and riding the schoolbus with their friends. A new school year means old friends, new friends, new backpacks, lunchboxes and school supplies... and of course, lots of "homework" for Roxy. So far I've only filled out one emergency contact form, but I know there have to be plenty more on the way. We ordered Target School Toolboxes for both girls and bought all the Hannah Montana and Camp Rock folders and notebooks we could find. They don't seem to make Desperate Housewives lunchboxes...bummer for me. Now we have to sharpen all the pencils (12 each of #2 and colored pencils X 2 girls = 48 pencils) and put labels on everything....lunchboxes, art smocks, water bottles, pencil boxes, and all those folders and notebooks.

London and Maddie each got three new pairs of fancy jeans they intend to wear as part of their girl band "uniform"...this a big change from Kindergarten Maddie who said jeans were "tooooooooooo tight." And I'm sure it would be a good idea to have my children's clothes clearly labelled with their names as well. Did I mention that London is the only Brownie whose badges are stapled instead of sewn onto her vest? Her troop leader keeps saying, "I'll let that slide for now...."

When I was a kid, I had a bit of a stationery fetish...actually, I still do...and I begged my parents for notebooks, pencils, pens, folders and a Dymo label maker to print Roxy, Roxy, Roxy all over my school supplies. Now that I'm the mom in charge, I should run right out and get one...there will be color labels on everything in sight! If only Dymo made adhesive Girl Scout "Try It" badges...

Those Other Desperate Housewives Return: Sunday, September 26th, 2008

Well, I'm not quite so desperate as to be counting the days, but I thought it was fitting here at Roxiticus Desperate Housewives to keep you up to date about those other Desperate Housewives on Wisteria Lane. While the last five minutes of last season's finale left some of us wondering whether Bree, Gabrielle, Lynette, Susan, Edie and Katherine would be back in the fall, the season premiere is coming on Sunday, September 26th.

At the end of the final episode in May, we fast forward five years: Katherine is now an intrinsic part of the housewives' weekly poker game and all other aspects of life on Wisteria Lane. Orson and Bree are back together. Gabrielle has a bedroom full of chubby chicas trying on her couture dresses and wearing her make-up smeared across their faces. Lynette's kids are all in trouble with the law. And when Susan arrives home, it's not Mike who greets her with a kiss, but a man we've never seen before...

Now, if I tried to do a five year fast forward on the Roxiticus Desperate Housewives? Bree has officially changed her name to Roxy, dropped 25 pounds, and celebrates her 45th birthday with La Bamba & the Hubcaps, Rex and 150 closest friends in a tent on the lawn, while London and Maddie and their girl band perform "We're Havin' a Party" with awesome horns in the background. Roxy's Best Of... has gone international, with 10,000 local bloggers worldwide and billions of dollars of ad revenue.

Gabrielle has two high school football hero sons from her time with Carlos, and has married her high school sweetheart, John, who continues his mysterious appearances at every Girls' Night Out. Lynette's kids are all in trouble with the law (joking, joking). Mary Alice has dyed her hair blonde and settled in to the OC as a surfer girl not in need of any unnatural augmentation, with two kids on the Palos Verdes junior high basketball team. And when Susan arrives home, Mike greets her not with a kiss, but with a cold Budweiser and a hot ribeye steak...

40th Birthday Surprise!

Rex and I went to the most amazing 40th birthday "surprise" party tonight. It wasn't really a surprise, but we had the best time. It was catered by Creativa in Parsippany, and while there was a buffet with caeser salad and ham and pizza and all sorts of other dishes, I just sat on a couch and let them feed me appetizers...lamb lollipops, coconut shrimp, Thai meatballs...yum. Despite the rain, the deejay (Jon Goldberg at 973-879-4983) started up in a tent outside, and we all got to dancin'. The birthday girl called to me, "Strap your hands 'cross my engines" and it just kept going! Cum On Feel the Noise, Talk Dirty to Me ("down the basement, lock the cellar door and baby, talk dirty to me!"), Bad Medicine, American Pie, Badlands, I Want You to Want Me, You Shook Me All Night Long!

This party inspired Rex and me to want to celebrate our next birthdays, though they're both odd numbers...maybe just the best Roxiticus Sunset Party ever...I'll have to get La Bamba & the Hubcaps before they move out to L.A. with Conan O'Brien.

Roxy's Back to School Body

Do you remember Bridget Jones' Diary? Bridget Jones is a fictional columnist, created by British writer Helen Fielding for her column in The Independent in 1995, which chronicled Bridget Jones's life as a thirtysomething single woman living in London, surrounded by a surrogate "urban family" of friends as she tries to make sense of life and love in the 1990s. Fielding's column lampooned the obsession of women with women's magazines such as Cosmopolitan and wider societal trends in Britain at the time. Helen Fielding published the novelisation of the column in 1996. Its 1999 sequel, Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason, wasn't nearly as good as the original. Both novels were adapted for the big screen, Bridget Jones' Diary in 2001 and Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason in 2004, both starring Renée Zellweger as Bridget Jones, and Hugh Grant as Daniel Cleaver and Colin Firth Mark Darcy, the men in her life. I started having children in 2001 and haven't seen either movie, even on DVD, so I can't tell you how they stack up against the novels. After Fielding had ceased to work for The Daily Telegraph in late 1998, The Independent started up the Bridget Jones' Diary feature again on August 4, 2005.

I read the book when it first came out in hardcover, back in 1996, and Bridget Jones is the inspiration for today's post. A sample entry in Bridget Jones' Diary might read: "126 lbs, alcohol units 9, cigarettes 28 (but will soon give up for Lent so might as well smoke self into disgusted smoking frenzy), calories 3826." While I promise not to overdo the updates on calories and alcohol units consumed, I thought it might help me keep up my fitness plan if I posted a little bit about it here on my Roxiticus Desperate Housewives blog. Weighing in at 160 pounds (I'm 5'7") on Day One (Friday, September 5th, 2008), I'd like to lose 25 pounds and get back to my "fighting weight" of 135, which I haven't really seen since Rex started cooking for me in 1996. Since bikini season is over, I'm not in any rush...my goal is to lose 1 pound per week for the next 25 weeks, maybe taking a week or two off around the holiday since it is impossible to eat one of Rex's Thanksgiving or Christmas dinners and lose weight that week!

Maybe a traditional fitness plan doesn't start on Pop-Tart Friday, but yesterday after the family breakfast (London: chocolate chip; Maddie: chocolate chip cookie dough; Roxy: blueberry frosted with sprinkles), I got the girls on the school bus and headed down to our gorgeous basement gym and resumed my on-again-off-again relationship with the elliptical trainer. I've gotten a bit out of shape over the summer, believe it or not, so I was only able to exercise in short intervals. I did a total of 25 minutes on the elliptical trainer (a blend of the easy levels one and three) as follows: 6 minutes, rest, 6.5 minutes, rest, 6.5 minutes, rest, 6 minutes, rest. "Travelled" 3.5 miles. Burned 350 calories.

Today, I ate a more nutritious breakfast of Total Honey Clusters and repeated my routine on the elliptical, lengthening the first two segments but running out of energy on the last two: a total of 25 minutes on the elliptical trainer (a blend of the easy levels one and three) as follows: 7.5 minutes, rest, 7.5 minutes, rest, 5 minutes, rest, 5 minutes, rest. "Travelled" 3.5 miles. Burned 350 calories.

As I mentioned earlier, I'm not going to bore you with constant updates on my weight and exercise program, but at some point I'll post photos of my home gym, and you might find Bridget-esque notes in the margins from time to time...wish me luck!

Thanks for reading.
Roxy

P.S. -- Can you believe I couldn't find a sponsor for this post?

Ooh...the Sproutwells Get a Package!!

We've made it back from the beach in Bay Head to the Roxiticus Valley, only to discover that the deer made short work of Rex's heirloom tomato garden while we were gone. We'll have to count on peaches and string beans from Parks Farm down the road for now, and make do with store-bought produce when Parks Farm closes for the season in the late Fall. Inspired by our Veggie Friends, The Sproutwells, we'll buy healthy fresh brands like Chiquita and Fresh Express and collect freshfunds points to earn prizes and bid on auction items like the Wii Fit & Fun Prize Pack.

Click the video below for the latest installment from the Sproutwells, your typical fruit and veggie family living among humans, trying to fit in our world. My favorite character, Rosey the nosey neighbor, spies while the Sproutwells receive another mysterious package from FreshFunds.com.



Here in the Roxiticus Valley, we have a great bunch of neighbors -- other than the developer across the street who lets his landscapers crash our mailbox on a weekly basis and leave big truck tire tracks in the newly planted grass at the top of our driveway -- and the houses are too far apart for a nosey neighbor like Rosey to get much satisfaction anyway. So I'll be able to enjoy my first delivery from FreshFunds.com in the privacy of my own home...but I'll be sure to share it with all my loyal Roxiticus Desperate Housewives readers.

Oh, That's Just Comcastic! Our Disney Channel is BROKEN! And the Comcastic Clowns Don't Plan to Fix It for Six Days!

As my loyal Roxiticus Desperate Housewives readers know, we've been away for most of the month of August, enjoying our beach house in Bay Head, New Jersey, without any television to get in the way, due to a long-running Who's-on-First style dispute with Comcast.

We returned home yesterday to discover 157 channels and nothing on...specifically, the Disney Channel is broken. After spending 30 minutes too many with SpongeBob SquarePants today, I called Comcast to see if there was a widespread Disney problem (a crazy Roxiticus Boycott of Hannah Montana that I didn't know about??!!), but it turns out it is just my house. All of the televisions in my house. We can watch reruns of Andy Griffith, dirty movies, the network news, or cartoons on Nickelodeon, but we can't catch up on the Suite Life of Zack & Cody or Hannah Montana episodes that we missed during August. And we'd better get used to it....the Comcastic clowns can't come until Tuesday, September 9th...SIX DAYS WITHOUT THE DISNEY CHANNEL??Did someone say claw hammer?

I've Got My Tickets for Cats at NJPAC (the New Jersey Performing Arts Center) in Newark, New Jersey

This past spring, I posted about two events that Rex, London, Maddie and I enjoyed at NJPAC (the New Jersey Performing Arts Center) in Newark, New Jersey. We saw Movin' Out, Twyla Tharp's interpretation of Billy Joel, in June, and Rex and the girls took me out for a Mother's Day treat to see Alvin Ailey. Both shows were spectacular, so we decided to make Alvin Ailey at NJPAC a Mother's Day tradition, and we also ordered tickets for Cats as soon as tickets for the 2008-2009 season were available. It looks like they've got a lot of other great events lined up, including:

Continue reading

From the Roxiticus Desperate Mailbag: Apricot & Ivy Online Children's Toys

Dear Roxy,

My husband and I met your realtor, Ann Tannen, at Natirar. She mentioned your site as a great resource for families. We are residents of Bernardsville, New Jersey. We moved out from Manhattan about 4 years ago. Needless to say, with two little ones at home, we haven't explored this area as much as we'd have hoped. Finding your blog has been a wonderful guide for us!

I'd like to offer a new business for your list of Kid Stuff. I run an online business called Apricot & Ivy. We sell European and USA toys for babies and young children. We are a new business (early 2007) and are housed in Bernardsville. We are building our business with a foundation of great customer service. We offer free gift cards, gift wrap, and usually include a free stuffed animal. We also work with a number of local and domestic charities. We have made donations to organizations large and small ... from local pre-schools to research hospitals (including Morristown Memorial and St Judes).

I hope you don't mind the suggestion. Your blog is so well-written, immensely informative and appears to be aimed at young families. All the best to you. My family and I look forward to trying out a number of the businesses you have mentioned on your site.

Kindest regards,
Apricot

Dear Apricot,
Thanks so much for your thoughtful e-mail, and my apologies for not getting back to you sooner. I've spent much of the summer away at our beach house in Bay Head, NJ, and launching a new blogging community called Roxy's Best Of.... I've visited your site and I'd be happy to post about your online business, Apricot & Ivy, hopefully in plenty of time for holiday shopping...my kids go back to school tomorrow and I'm hoping to be a more prolific blogger in the "new year."

All the best,
Roxy

If It Happens In Real Life, It Happens On Desperate Housewives: Palin Says Daughter, 17, Is Pregnant...All to Squelch Rumors That Veep, Like Bree...

...was pretending that her daughter's baby, born in April, was actually her own.

OK, now that I've filled your minds with sensationalist tabloid rumors, here's the story according to AOL News:

John McCain's running mate Sarah Palin said Monday that her 17-year-old unmarried daughter is five months pregnant, an announcement campaign aides said was aimed at rebutting Internet rumors that Palin's youngest son, born in April, was actually her daughter's. A statement released by the campaign said that Bristol Palin will keep her baby and marry the child's father. Bristol Palin's baby is due in late December.

"Our beautiful daughter Bristol came to us with news that as parents we knew would make her grow up faster than we had ever planned. We're proud of Bristol's decision to have her baby and even prouder to become grandparents," Sarah and Todd Palin said in the brief statement.

The disclosure of the pregnancy came on the opening day of the Republican National Convention, scaled back because of Hurricane Gustav, and three days after McCain named Palin as his running mate. The other news was likely to overshadow the disclosure.

The first-term Alaska governor was in Minnesota preparing for her acceptance speech when the campaign issued the statement; her family was home in Alaska. "Bristol and the young man she will marry are going to realize very quickly the difficulties of raising a child, which is why they will have the love and support of our entire family," they added.

Lucky for all the Palins, the baby's father is not also Bristol's father, as her mother's point of view is that children born of incest still have the right to life.

P.S. -- Though you'll rarely find Roxy waxing political, lest this post cause you to mistake my political leanings, when my kids leave their toys, bikes and trash out on the front lawn, I tell them to "please put it away and stop acting like the Clintons." Looking forward to those calls from London's second grade teacher around election time.

Paper Mill Playhouse Holding Auditions for High School Musical: London and Maddie Missed the 16-Year-Old Age CutOff (Thankfully by Quite a Few Years)

Paper Mill Playhouse, in Millburn, New Jersey, is holding an open call on Saturday, September 6th, for male and female singers, ages 16 and up to play high school students in the upcoming production of Disney's High School Musical. London and Maddie missed the age cut-off...thankfully I have quite a few years before they start their teenage years... but if you have or know a 16-year-old high school musical fan who can belt out a tune, check out the Paper Mill Playhouse casting page for all the details!