Monday, September 08, 2008

Those Other Desperate Housewives Return: Sunday, September 26th, 2008

Well, I'm not quite so desperate as to be counting the days, but I thought it was fitting here at Roxiticus Desperate Housewives to keep you up to date about those other Desperate Housewives on Wisteria Lane. While the last five minutes of last season's finale left some of us wondering whether Bree, Gabrielle, Lynette, Susan, Edie and Katherine would be back in the fall, the season premiere is coming on Sunday, September 26th.

At the end of the final episode in May, we fast forward five years: Katherine is now an intrinsic part of the housewives' weekly poker game and all other aspects of life on Wisteria Lane. Orson and Bree are back together. Gabrielle has a bedroom full of chubby chicas trying on her couture dresses and wearing her make-up smeared across their faces. Lynette's kids are all in trouble with the law. And when Susan arrives home, it's not Mike who greets her with a kiss, but a man we've never seen before...

Now, if I tried to do a five year fast forward on the Roxiticus Desperate Housewives? Bree has officially changed her name to Roxy, dropped 25 pounds, and celebrates her 45th birthday with La Bamba & the Hubcaps, Rex and 150 closest friends in a tent on the lawn, while London and Maddie and their girl band perform "We're Havin' a Party" with awesome horns in the background. Roxy's Best Of... has gone international, with 10,000 local bloggers worldwide and billions of dollars of ad revenue.

Gabrielle has two high school football hero sons from her time with Carlos, and has married her high school sweetheart, John, who continues his mysterious appearances at every Girls' Night Out. Lynette's kids are all in trouble with the law (joking, joking). Mary Alice has dyed her hair blonde and settled in to the OC as a surfer girl not in need of any unnatural augmentation, with two kids on the Palos Verdes junior high basketball team. And when Susan arrives home, Mike greets her not with a kiss, but with a cold Budweiser and a hot ribeye steak...


LadyJava said...

heheh Roxy.. as much as I would love to see what happened.. your version is cool too!! hehe..

I really wonder who that chap was that was kissing Susan and where in heavens name is Mike??

I hate John.. he's such a weakling.... I would much rather Gabby stays on with Carlos.. I'm wondering now if he regained his sight... ahhh... cant' wait... btw.. are you into Prison Break.. Oggling Time... Wentworth Miller...woot!!!!

Anonymous said...

I still love this show. Somehow it keeps me coming back. I did get a nice catch up from last season at

Matthew S. Urdan said...

I'M counting the days...I need something other than politics to entertain me, and I'm looking forward to the return of Eli Stone, Desperate Housewives, Brothers and Sisters, and the Detroit Red Wings Hockey Season.