Thursday, May 15, 2008

Is Candy Pregnant?

A couple of weeks ago, my nanny called me up in the morning on her day off to shriek, "Turn on your TV!! You didn't tell me your niece was pregnant!" Dutifully, I turned on Channel 11, and there was Candy, big as a heifer in a maternity outfit. After the brief segment on some hot new designer's looks for Spring/Summer 2008, I turned off the TV and dialed my mother, Candy's grandmother.

"Is Candy pregnant? She was just on TV and she's as big as a house. How could you know this and not tell me?!"

Grandmom answers, "I don't know, dear...let me give her mother a call and see what I can find out."

Now, at 83 years of age, Grandmom's vision isn't the best, so when she hit the little speed dial number on her cell phone, she accidentally hit the number for Candy instead of speed dialing my sister. At 83 years of age, Grandmom's hearing isn't the best, so when Candy had answered the phone, Grandmom didn't notice that is was not my sister speaking. "Is Candy pregnant?" Grandmom demanded to know, "Roxy saw her on TV and says she's as big as a house! She's five months along if she's a day."

Oh, how mortifying for your friend Roxy. As it turns out, Candy insists that she's just put on a little weight since the wedding, thanks to her new hubby's terrific cooking. A likely story! And the maternity clothes? "Empire waists are all the rage in New York these days. Candy would know about fashion," says Grandmom. Candy at least had a sense of humor about the whole thing, and harkened back to the time a couple of years ago when she was very single, very thin, and very embarrassed when Al Roker asked her when she was due. Thankfully, they were not on the air at the time.

All of this (well, except the Al Roker part) would never have happened if one of us had just given Grandmom a Jitterbug cell phone for Christmas.

Instead of creating and/or amplifying our senior moments, Jitterbug cell phones are easy to use and include live, friendly, helpful customer service. Jitterbug has 24-hour operators who will help Grandmom to manage her phone contacts, even dial calls for her. The phones are simple, with bigger, backlit buttons. Bright, large text. The powerful speaker sounds it out loud and clear. Plus, Jitterbug is affordable, even for Grandmom. Service starts at just $10 a month, with no long distance or roaming fees and no contracts with fine print to worry about.

Grandmom can also accessorize her Jitterbug phone...check out the Jitterbug web site to add a phone charger (order today to get a free car charger, though maybe Grandmom shouldn't be driving), extra batteries, a black leather case, red beaded lanyard, and other goodies that will get you into the Daughter or Granddaughter of the Month Club.