Saturday, April 05, 2008

Spring Housekeeping

Am I the only one who can't stand it when my housekeeper comes? Our housekeeper, Margaret, is a very hardworking older woman who only speaks Polish. Margaret treats my girls like royalty. She gets down on her hands and knees to scrub the floors; clearly, I can't fault her work ethic, so why does she drive me nuts?

Margaret comes to clean our house every Thursday, and every Wednesday night I am a nervous wreck trying to get ready for her. My friend Hope, who is a stay-at-home mom of four, fired her own housekeeper because she couldn't stand that night-before-the-housekeeper feeling each week. While I am a clean person (kitchens and bathrooms spic n' span, no dirt and grime anywhere), I am NOT a tidy person. Rex is always glad to come home to Margaret's clear countertops, but every Thursday night, I'm stressed out when I can't find the things that I left lying around the house when I left Margaret in charge and took the train in to my NYC office that morning. Paperwork, credit cards, page turners, you name it and it can't be found.

The other issue is that when I said Margaret only speaks Polish, I meant it. No English whatsoever. When we first got started, the guy who drives the Polish cleaning ladies to their appointed rounds came in to translate. However, when I told him to make it clear to Margaret not to put my lingerie in the dryer, just for fun he told her not to put my jeans in the dryer. So I came home to panties that were toast from the heat of the dryer and several pairs of soggy jeans draped over the furniture!

One other game the girls and I play every Thursday evening is called "Find the Fire Hazard." Margaret doesn't seem to understand that light bulbs can get quite hot, so when she's dusting off a night table, she'll pick things up and get them out of the way....onto the top of a lamp!

Please feel free to post your best Housekeeper Gone Wild story in my comments section below....